Anyway, a lot of things are going on and has happened since last time I wrote. I don't know where to begin but well, here's the story.
A month and a half ago me and Jared started to seriously think about what we were going to do with our future plans, if we were gonna stay at the Swanz ranch here in Montana, find another ranch, move closer to Jared's family in Missouri, stay as permenent residents in Sweden, or do something completely different... It has been a lot of thoughts going on. We feel very lucky and greatful for this last year, when we have been able to experience this big family adventure. But aside of all the fun memories, it has also been a year full of planning, packing, travelling, moving and time apart from eachother... We have discussed different options back and forth, and it's so difficult to make decisions about what we are going to do (at least) for the next year before Natalie is really starting school. We feel that we still have time to try out the options we have, before we have to settle more permanent in one location. The fact that we are a swedish/american family will always be present and something that we have to consider when it comes to making decisions about how we want to live our lives, where and even which country we eventually are going to settle in...
Before we took a decision about either getting really settled in at the Swanz's ranch, or pack our things and leave, we had to consider that my visa for permenent residency wasn't done, so we knew I had to leave the country before my 90 days were over. Which meant, no matter what, I had to fly back to Sweden before Easter. At this point all we knew about the visa process was that all papers were approved, but we still waited for a date to attend to the interview at the embassy in Stockholm so theoretically it could be several months again. We knew that we didn't want to be apart for as long as we were over the winter, and we had really hoped and believed that my visa would be done long time ago....but unfortuantely not, so what was the best thing to do?
We both really liked staying at the ranch here. The setting and environment around is so beautiful, good salary and benefits, very friendly community, a charming, safe and educational little school for Natalie and the Swanz family are truly intelligent, positive, considerate and loving people that we really appreciate we got the opportunity to get to meet. Few things spoke against staying but for us as a family they were important to consider. Since the winters are so long and sometimes rough here, we thought (or mostly me), that the ranch is in a little too remote location. It is hard to find different activities within an hour drive when you have two little girls. To get many options you have to go around 1 h 45 min to Billings and that's nothing you all of a sudden do in the weekdays after school. It's like going from Sölvesborg - Malmö roundtrip just to go swim or attend gymnastic class on a tuesday evening or so... It might sound like a minor problem when you are at a big ranch full of animals and nature, but in the winter there are long time periods when you cant really take advantage of what the ranch has to offer to activate the kids. It might be of bigger concern for me than others because it's a new way of life for me, and that I'm so use to have things closer. I'm sure that's something I'd get use to, but it still doesn't take away the fact that there are quite a few years until Jamie starts school and that both girls need to get activated and socialize with other kids on a regular basis. ( Of course there are other kids in the area and Natalie already started to make friends and had a very good, stimulating time in school, but it is a small community and there are just not so many small kids around...) Another thing was that I felt that it'd be hard for me, even if I wanted within a year or so, to actually get a part time job because there were no daycares around in the area. I think I'd like to be a stay at home mom for a little while longer, but I am of that nature that eventually I need to work and meet collegues on a more daily basis to feel good, so that could have caused problems if I didn't even have a realistic possibility to do so. After thinking about this day and night for quite a while, we took an emotional decision to pack our things and leave this beautiful ranch. Jared was going to stay and work for few weeks after me and the girls had to leave. Then take a roadtrip down to the family in Missouri and fly to Sweden from there. If things were different with my visa done, I think we'd stayed until shipping in October so we at least could enjoy the most beautiful and green part of the year in Montana. But there were not so much to do about that since we didn't want to split the family for a longer time period again. So after packing, crying and saying goodbye to the Swanz, me and the girls left the ranch and flew back to Sweden the 14:th of April.
Even though we technically left Montana, I really feel that at least I'm not done with this amazing state. I'm sure we will be back in Montana in foreseeable future! (And of course we will go visit the Swanz family and continue what hopefully will be a lifelong friendship!)
So right now our things are packed down and safely stored in Missouri, Jared is flying over the Atlantic very soon and we are going to enjoy the best part of the year in Sweden. After my visa is completely done, we finally have the opportunity to try to fully live in USA without having the stress that me and the girls need to leave, or that I'm not allowed to work...So no matter where the road might lead us after the summer I'm sure we will have an exciting time ahead of us!
(I will write more about Montana, the community and school another day...)
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